How to Give Compliments

What’s the best way to compliment someone on their physical appearance when you find them attractive?

Look for something unique about the individual.

If something is obvious, it’s likely that the person has heard the compliment before, and scarcity is often more meaningful. Particularly if this individual fits societal norms of physical attractiveness, using a generic compliment such as, “you’re hot” is just not going to cut it. (P.S. the idea of actually using that as a compliment is cringe-worthy).

Instead, look to small details that the person clearly put thoughtful effort in. Here are a few of my favorites:

  • Socks – people wear some seriously interesting socks! My favorite is a peep of bright color socks paired with a tailored suit that only is revealed upon sitting.

  • Earrings – particularly if the earrings look like something you haven’t seen before. Maybe they have a unique design or texture rather than a clear stone?

  • Watch – but only if it’s a unique watch, otherwise if it’s a generic expensive watch it may indicate materialism since some people associate watches as a status symbol.

  • Shade – you can compliment someone on a color they are wearing, but if you really want to wow them compliment the particular shade of the color they have chosen. For example, don’t just mention, “you look great in blue!” Instead try, “that shade of blue looks great on you!”

What’s the point of all this?

Delivering a compliment that is slightly more unique indicates that you are more interested in the recipient since you put more effort in to notice the details. If you are nervous about approaching someone that you are attracted to/don’t know how your partner will react, try it out on regular people around you. I bet you’ll be surprised how much a compliment can brighten someone’s day!

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